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Monday, January 10, 2005

24 in 99: Hours 1 and 2

Welcome to the premiere of JoeVideo's 24 in 99. In fact, since last night's premiere was actually two episodes, this synposis should really be called 24 in 198. Here's what happened:

Jack's now in taboo-love with new Boss Heller's separated daughter, Audrey. Explosive action time: A guy handcuffed to a briefcase on a train! Guy on a motorcycle with a gun! A parked truck with explosives sitting on the tracks! BOOM!

Bauer meets with Erin Driscoll, CTU chief-of-bureaucracy, who fired him 18 months ago. CTU features new faces like Sopranos-ubergeek Edgar Stiles, AND CHLOE. Thank god they kept her, because college-chum Andrew Paige calls her and says, "SHITE, I've been hacking and found a corrupt NAT-TABLE on the Internets, we're all gonna die!"

Jack goes to CTU and instantly outsmarts everyone there, finds Turkish terrorist Tomas Sherek looking for his dry cleaning, uses the "Tell me where the (insert-this-week's-problem) is" card after he shoots him... it's Heller and Audrey they're after, abducted while visiting son Richard ("Ashton-the-protestor").

"The family that grows up together, blows up shit together." Mom and Dad Araz work for bad guys, and they've trained teenage son Behrooz how to pass around the stolen briefcase- if only he could resist the white women! Ronnie (who took Bauer's job) spars with Jack and gets shot. Andrew is abducted. An incredibly realistic webcast of Heller-in-chains follows. Until Monday...

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