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Thursday, January 06, 2005

Wiggin' Out! with Sydney Bristow: Week One

Welcome to the first edition of Wiggin' Out! with Sydney Bristow, the only place on the 'net keeping an official tally of faux hair worn by the lovely and talented Jennifer Garner on Alias. We have two full hours to tally this time, so let's get to it.

Hour One: Authorized Personnel Only, Part 1

9:01: The episode and the season start with a bang. In an apparant flashback, J-Gar dons a blonde paigeboy wig (#1) to match her skimpy but tasteful lingerie. This wig also seems to be applied with Super Poli-grip, as it somehow remains affixed to her head despite her hanging outside the cargo door of a speeding train.

9:07: Syd now slaps on a somewhat longer black wig (#2), accompanied by a PG-13 ensemble consisting of an open shirt tied in a knot, exposing her ample 'intel' to the cool, crisp night air and giving me the urge for a serious 'debrief.'

9:11: In an exciting twist, Ms. Bristow changes right from her previous wig (#2) into a stringy blonde wig (#3) to complete her hott-in-a-dirty-girl-Courtney-Love-kind-of-way outfit. That's three wigs in 11 minutes, people! Looks like it's going to be quite a season.

9:21: Show open. It's new! And has lots of sizzling Syd shottage, mostly in wigs. But it's only an intro, consisting of mostly old footage, and will be played every week. So we won't include these wigs in the tally (although we counted 28 of the cutsie buggers).

9:31: We now flash-forward back to the blonde paigeboy (#1). Drat. Can't count it.

Authorized Personnel Only, Part 1 total: 3 wigs

Hour Two: Authorized Personnel Only, Part 2

Although the hour contains some Vaughn-Brustow spy sex, ample familial angst, and the triumphant return of everybody's favorite geek Marshall, this episode has NO friggin' wigs. What gives?

Authorized Personnel Only, Part 2 total: 0 wigs

Season total: 3 wigs

1 other geekspeak:

  • I counted 30 wigs in the open... and I'm devastated that my namesake is apparently dead. (Sniff)

    -Irina D.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:52 AM  

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