Wednesday, February 02, 2005

Martha Stewart Warden Of New Apprentice

For Martha Stewart, crime really does pay.

As if Trump's weekly egofest wasn't enough, now NBC is launching a second version of The Apprentice in Martha's OmniMedia boardroom. This, in addition to her new NBC syndicated daytime show, will have the Domestic Diva rolling in dough for years.

As an aside, one thing has become clear: between this and ABC's upcoming Blind Justice, the networks are officially fresh out of ideas.

Forever Our Girl?

American Idol judge Paula Abdul wants to sing again.

Since turnabout is fair play, we wonder: will she give Americans their chance to critique her "art" on national TV?

Power Companies Jolted By Fear Factor Stunt

The electric industry is afraid that a "shocking" episode of NBC's Fear Factor, where contestants get shocked with current could inspire moronic copycats.

Not to be too callous here, but anyone dumb enough to imitate anything seen on Fear Factor wouldn't be missed much.

What About Bob?

Looks like CBS has found a replacement for Dan Rather.

This morning's USA Today reports the embattled Eye net is ready to install relative whippersnapper Bob Schieffer as interim anchor for CBS Evening News. Executives are still mulling a complete overhaul of the format.

Glad to see the network is keeping its promise to get younger.

Koppel On The Move?

These news organizations are all obsessed with getting younger.

Now there's talk that crusty veteran Ted Koppel and boyish up-and-comer George Stephanopolous could switch places, with Koppel taking the reigns of Sunday Morning's This Week and Stephanopolous helming of Nightline.

Another option is to ditch Nightline altogether and do something else at 11:30.

Another Nail In TiVo's Coffin?

Less than three weeks after Michael Ramsay, co-founder of TiVo, stepped down as CEO, Marty Yudkovitz has resigned as president.

Is it time for TiVo disciples to panic? Or can things only get better for the company from here? I still think they should explore some sort of merger or partnership with Apple (iTiVo, anyone?), but one thing's for sure: they have to get their act in gear, and quick.

Technology for Technology's Sake

Fox Sports is taking a page from its baseball coverage, where they buried lipstick cameras in the dirt by home plate (so crybaby wuss-bag Jorge Posada could cover them over). Get ready for Super Bowl Turf Cams!

Yaaaawn. More Fox overkill. What's next? A football version of Scooter?

Yogi Berra Sues TBS

TBS is the home of some of TV's funniest comedies- but Yogi Berra isn't laughing.

He's suing the Superstation for $10 million over a Sex and the City ad that referred to something called a "yogasm," defining it as "sex with Yogi Berra".

We define it as just kind of icky.

NBC Fey-ning Interest

In another example of art imitating art, NBC has ordered a pilot starring Saturday Night Live's Tina Fey as a head writer for a comedy show. Fey will play the role of executive producer on the show, as well as behind the camera.

Which begs the question: if picked up, will Fey's reign as real-life head writer of SNL end?

American Nightmare

Looks like the Peacock's 8pm Sunday slot may be up for grabs in the fall.

NBC has trimmed its season order of American Dreams from 19 episodes to 17. And to add fuel to the cancellation fire, the show will also be pulled for February sweeps.

Never a good sign.

Tonight's Tube

After a new Lost on ABC, which we beg you to choose over the mind-numbing American Idol, you have a choice: you can watch our current president deliver the State of the Union, or you can watch a fake, future president deliver the WB’s Jack and Bobby. Afterwards, you tell us which script is more believable.

Wednesday Trivia: !

Which show never existed?

a) Cleghorne!
b) It's Love!
c) Sledge Hammer!
d) Voyagers!

Answers tomorrow.

Tuesday Trivia Solved: &

Which show never actually existed?

a) Flash & The Fanelli Boys
b) Me & The Boys
c) Rhythm & Blues
d) MacGruder & Loud

Answer: a) Flash & The Fanelli Boys ain't real. Nope. Not at all.

Static From The Geek-In-Chief: Just Askin'

A few thoughts going into sweeps:

If NBC's Jeff Zucker insists that February sweeps are now irrelevant, will he not care when his network finishes fourth this time?

Does all the lame stunt casting really make people more willing to watch Will and Grace?

How much did A&E's continued regret over letting Law & Order slip away play into their aggressive bid to land The Sopranos?

And while we're asking, how watchable will The Sopranos be without all the colorful language and violence? And will enough people watch to make the ransom A&E paid worth it?

If the Parents Television Council had its druthers, would all prime-time TV resemble PAX-TV's not-so-edgy lineup? And why do they constantly ignore the fact that parents should be responsible for what their children watch?

Dammit, when is TiVo gonna release a standalone HD-ready DVR? And while they're at it, can they make it a dual tuner model, please?

If Spongebob being gay is such a big deal, why have we gone years without "outing" Peppermint Patty, Scooby Doo's Velma, or He-Man?

After ABC premieres Blind Justice, its new drama about a gun-toting blind cop, where is there left for them to go? A drama about a limbless, piano-playing child prodigy?

Will seeing how old the cast of Happy Days has gotten in their reunion special be a hoot- or just enormously depressing?

When is Alias going to get good again?

>If Donald Trump, Jennifer Schefft and the SuperNanny were fitted for cement shoes and dropped into Lake Champlain, never to be seen on TV again… would anyone truly be all that upset?

When Johnny Carson passed away last week, was it wrong to feel like he'd already been dead for years?

Why must 24 always have a lame, unrelated storyline featuring an annoying, troubled blonde daughter? And if it must, why can't she be as hott as Elisha Cuthbert?

With the surging Medium and the resurgent Law and Order chipping away, is CBS' CSI: franchise finally (and justifiably) showing some age?

Lewis Black is admittedly hilarious, but can his rant-filled schtick possibly support a show all by itself?

How long until ABC starts ending Lost at 9:10pm?

Is our collective IQ so low that assloads of people still need to watch The Simple Life?

How long will Fox continue to stay with the brilliant but grossly underwatched Arrested Development? And doesn't the network realize that it may do better in a timeslot not surrounded by cartoons?

And finally… would somebody please tell Star Jones Reynolds to shut the fuck up?

Got answers? Click the comments link and contribute!

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