Friday, March 18, 2005

Geek Of The Week

This week's nod goes to Kirstie Alley, who's Fat Actress is turning out to be a ratings featherweight. The show lost 2/3 of its audience from its premiere last week, which surely gave Showtime execs a touch of agita.

Web Whiparound: Spring Break Shark Attack: So Bad, It's Bad

We here at love a good shark movie more than anyone. Too bad, in history, there's really only been one of them. And judging by the reviews for Sunday's Spring Break Shark Attack on CBS, that tally stands.

But it'll sure be hard to resist the alluring combo of big-toothed, fake sharks and big-breasted, nubile co-eds. Come to think of it, this flick is sounding better and better. God Bless the Tiffany Network!

NY Post: Big plastic sharks coming to a screen near you
USA Today: What not to watch this weekend
Shark Attack: Sinking fast (registration required)
Hollywood Reporter: Mindless, empty-headed, lots of fun and going nowhere fast
Kansas City Star: When cheesy TV movies attack!
South Florida Sun-Sentinel: Cheesy CBS film will have viewers
Pittsburgh Post-Gazette: Shark Attack cheesy bait to lure viewers

Academy Still Mulling Emmy Changes

The Academy of Television Arts & Sciences is still looking to overhaul its annual Primetime Emmy Awards telecast.

Among the changes: show less awards, leaving time for more... uh, "filler". (Sounds like a great idea.)

Also, the resurrection of the "Best New Show" award is still on the table.

More Pilot Stuff

One woman party and Lindsay Lohan idol Tara Reid text is going to the chapel in Fox's drama pilot "Hitched," about a brother-sister team that manages a one-stop Vegas wedding emporium.... Former Dream On star Brian Benben joins Lenny Clarke in ABC's comedy Neighbors... NewsRadio alum and Celebrity Poker Showdown host Dave Foley has joined The Station Agent's Peter Dinklage in an as yet untitled ABC project... Christine Baranski hopes the third time's a charm: after the Emmy winning Cybill star apperared in two failed pilots earlier this year, she gets one more chance as an adoptive mother in ABC's cleverly titled Adopted.

More Wire for HBO

Out own Irina D. can finally relax.

After months of uncertainty, HBO has renewed the drama series The Wire for a fourth season.

The channel ordered 12 additional episodes after executive producer David Simon outlined a stroy arc that gave the series a fresh.

Maybe now I'll finally watch?

First The Donald, Now The Domestic Diva

Not to be outdone by ABC's Trump biopic, CBS is rushing a Martha Stewart movie to air. It will be based on the last six years of her life.

Here's hoping for a few showerroom love scenes. Hubba hubba!

Stalkers Still Love Dave

Loonies still love Letterman.

A painter working at David Letterman's Montana ranch was charged Thursday with plotting to kidnap the talk-show host's toddler son and nanny and hold them for $5 million ransom.

What draws these head cases to Letterman? Is he just unlucky? For years, he was targeted by a stalker who called herself "Mrs. David Letterman" and continuously broke into his Connecticut house, and now this.

The Friday "Eff Off!" Cold Pizza

99 not-so-kind-words for ESPN's "informative" morning show.

I'm not even sure Cold Pizza was a good idea.

It's ESPN2's venture into the morning talk show genre, but it's de-volved into nothing more than irrelevant banter that reveals no news or information.

They started with a pretty boy and three chicks. One who couldn't speak English, another who's main claims to fame were the Real World and sleeping with an ESPN executive. They wisely dumped those two.

And hottie Thea Andrews, the only reason to watch, was also recently sent packing. It's now completely unwatchable.

Stick with 80 reruns of SportsCenter. At least you might learn something.

Thursday Trivia Solved: M*A*S*H week, day four

What was the real first name of "Trapper John"?

A) John Francis Patrick
B) Francis Xavier
C) Walter Eugene
D) Benjamin Franklin

Answer: A) John Francis Patrick.