Danza Flips Out

Tony Danza must be mighty glad he's not a few inches taller today (aren't we all?) after NASCAR vet Rusty Wallace flipped his ass over on his daily talk show.

The near fatal crash occurred during the latest edition of the DayTony (get it?) 500.

Click here to see the video of yesterday's hilarious debacle.

Sagging NBC Set To Lose Million$

For the first time in years, when advertisers open their wallets this May, NBC will likely lose bragging rights- and oodles of cashola.

After tumbling from first to fourth place in the ratings race, while watching CBS and Fox dominate and ABC rise from the dead, NBC stands to lose as much as $550 million in advertising dollars heading into upfront season.

Yikes.

Paris Can't Fire Bitchy Richie: Fox

Despite what labia flapping debutante Paris Hilton says, Fox says no decision has been made on whether Nicole Richie will return for a fourth season of The Simple Life- and won't be for several weeks.

Hilton has insited that Richie is off the show and is being replaced by Kimberly Stewart (daughter of rocker Rod Stewart).

Hilton and Richie, once close pals, had a falling out last month. Rumor has it that Paris had a hissy fit when Richie invited pals over to watch The Simple Life- and followed the broadcast by showing Hilton's infamous X-rated tape.

Now that's a party.

Pam Won't Share Screen With Chimp

Plastic-filled palm-pillow pusher-outer Pamela Anderson is refusing to act opposite a chimp in a scene from her new Fox sitcom Stacked, reports MSNBC gossip Jeannette Walls.

The reason? Anderson, a spokeswoman for PETA and an affirmed anti-fur activist, thinks it's cruel. That, or she's intimidated by the superior acting talents of said ape.

Don Knotts Still Alive; World Stunned

124-year-old Don Knotts will get the first star on what could become West Virginia's version of the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

"We're starting with somebody we know and then we'll see where it goes," Jack Thompson, spokesman for the Greater Morgantown Convention & Visitors Bureau, said Monday.

Other West Virginia celebs include Kathy Mattea, Brad Paisley, Jennifer Garner, and A-level megastar Soupy Sales.

Roberts Bumped Up to GMA Anchor

ABC has anointed Robin Roberts as a new, full-time anchor, alongside Charles Gibson and Diane Sawyer, on Good Morning America.

Roberts, 44, a former college basketball star, moved into a chair beside her colleagues on Monday's GMA. The ABC News broadcast has been closing the ratings gap recently with its NBC archrival, Today.

24 in 99: 3:00am-4:00am

Here's our 99 word recap of this week's 24.

Lee Jong Lives! He gives CTU Marwan's location. Audrey remains confused over the Jack/Paul triangle now that Paul's dead. The Chinese know who raided their consulate and demands CTU give some answers. When questioned, Edgar doesn't know the alibis and gives it all away. Best-line-ever: Buchanan tells Chloe that "we're too busy for your personality disorder!" Tony professes his longing for Michelle. Palmer and Novick are confronted by President Logan over the Chinese incident, but proceed with the coverup. Marwan's FINALLY caught by Jack, but oops, it's too late. The nuclear warhead is launched on a missle... Destination unknown...

JoeVideo writes 24 in 99 every Tuesday, while desperately trying to tame his own personality disorder.

Tonight's Tube

If you're too annoyed by Will & Grace's latest sweeps stunt casting (Stacy Keach and Blythe Danner? Big whoop) to deal, it's the season finale of the beloved Veronica Mars- where the big mystery will be solved! I guess it's too late to start watching?

DVD on TV: New Releases

These TV-related DVDs are available in stores beginning today.

American Chopper: Season 1
American Chopper: Season 2
Dastardly and Mutley in Their Flying Machines: Complete Series
★ Entourage: Season 1
Futurama: Monster Robot Manica Fun Collection
Have Gun Will Travel - Season 2
★ In Living Color: Season 3
James Dean: TV Years
Jamie's Kitchen (Jamie Oliver): Complete Series
Joan of Arcadia: Season 1
Monster Garage: Season 1
Monster Garage: Season 2
Motorcycle Mania 3: Jesse James Rides Again
Mutant X: Season 2
My Favorite Martian: Season 2
Ninja Scroll: Series - Limited Edition
Quantum Leap: Season 3
Partridge Family: Season 1
Perils of Penelope Pitstop: Series

★ TVGS recommendation

Monday Trivia Solved: Alias week, day 1

Where was Sydney when her fiancee, Daniel Hecht, was murdered?

A) Washington, DC
B) Paris
C) Singapore
D) Taipei

Answer: D) Taipei