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Wednesday, January 18, 2006

ABC's Reasons Why Not To Make Any More Shows Starring Heather Graham or John Stamos

Tying the record for shortest tenured prime-time series ever (The Will, anyone?) is nothing to be proud of. But when you're as shitty of an actress as Heather Graham, I guess you take your publicity where you can get it.

ABC has yanked Emily's Reasons Why Not after just one episode. The show, billed as the second coming of Sex and the City (ha!), will grab some bench with Jake in Progress into February sweeps. It's unclear when (if?) either show will return.

What powerhouse programming is ABC replacing these comedic kumquats with in the short term? Get this: a rerun of the anemically performing The Bachelor. Yikes. Why not just throw up some bars and tone?

It's unclear when (if?) either show will return.

Some good news: both shows will have to scoot over and make room for the highly unwatchable Hope and Faith, which is also being iced through the ratings book.

Meanwhile, for Graham and her truly stunning breasts, which should remain unfettered by shirtage or any other cloth-like concealments, should get PT Anderson on the phone and pitch Boogie Nights 2: Rollergirl's Revenge. It's the only thing this writer is interested in watching her in at this point.

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